Permuter Retrospective 1
here it is its basically geometry wars lol lmao hehe
im really happy with this, its polished, feels pretty tense and im really pleased it only took a single quiet weekend, it was very fun to make. ive still got game jam musclesss
although, comparing the experience of this to making my other larger projects woke me up to pattern that my finished projects have - all my shipped games are simple platformers, pixel art, etc, because anything more complex or demanding is just... impossible to make presentable or robust. ive had friends say that it's lazy, but i'm realising it's just reality. it has to be SIMPLE or it just wont exist. i've been trying to make games with deeper systems, and i think i try too hard to make a game with some sort of Twist or Hook or SomethingThatsNeverBeenDone. this ends up with me hitting design walls which i dont have the skill to overcome, i get confused and disheartened, then i quit
so, just for now, it might be more worth it to do what other devs do and copy games i love and just tweak it a little teehee
so!! ill keep it so much simpler from now on heehoo
looking back at my catalogue of work, i'm quite surprised at how game-y all of my work is. there's like, "real" games, and then there's game-y games, yknow? i'm not sure if i even believe this but this is the vibe i get from other people. i'm very biased towards deep, nerdy, systems-y games, probably because im an engineer. but not everyone is an engineer, and even most engineers likely don't have my same flavour of autism
i don't think about narrative much, or purpose, or motivation. it's just not what excites me when i sit down to create. a systems sandbox is more than enough for me. im making things just for myself, which is fun, but i want other people to actually play my stuff!!
id like to put in more effort into figuring out what makes people want to play a game for hours in the first place, and making a game that gives people something to talk about after playing it. this geometry game of course doesn't really inspire discussion, it's honestly just a fun not-too-challenging realtime reaction test with progression a la vampire survivors. it's a game
but im not sure if "just a game a la vampire survivors" is really what i want to make long-term.. i've really enjoyed making everything i've made, but i think i'd like to focus on what i really want to achieve, which is my art inspiring something, even if it's only for a tiny number of people
which is hard!!!! i guess i can begin by giving my games any freaking story at all!!!
for this geometry game, i have a small idea for a narrative if people enjoy the roughbox prototype. it's an old (very old!! 2020 old!! wtf i grew grey hairs looking through my concepts folder, i thought this was like 1 year ago) idea i had about a pilot battling eva-style angels who invade earth. you play as a terrified pilot, trying her best to fight against the angels and beating herself up over her failures. her friends are reassuring her on the intercom - yes she's failing, but she's also doing great work, and she's the only pilot who actually showed up, every other pilot was too scared. she's failing but failure is a huge part of trying. its a story of realising self worth and seeing failure as something really good!! idk!! its important to me!! i read and write like a 0 year old its actually so embarassing
anyway, i think im pretty good at making a game generally fun, it's actually quite an easy thing to do and is simple to learn, but i want to let my art give people something to talk about - even if the only thing to talk about is how Bad it is or how Goofy a certain moment was. ive been so scared of giving my games a strong identity in case it's cringe, but i think id welcome cringe now.. but i have a lot to learn, and i dont even know where to begin
which is very exciting!
